Trying so hard
I’m so stressed rn. I just turned 23, but I’m almost at day 4. I’ve been irritable recently which is to be expected, but today, for the second day in a row, my roommate has been a passive aggressive dickhead. And I almost relapsed. I opened Reddit and began LOOKING at porn, but I didn’t act on it. For some, they may count this as a relapse. But I want to be mindful/kind to myself that these urges are OKAY and to be expected. It’s not great though. My partner recently, for my birthday, took a bunch of nude Polaroids. I do want to eventually cut out masturbation ALTOGETHER, but one step at a time. These, I THINK are okay for now. Let’s take it day by day, get to a week without porn, keep going strong with this, and then we’ll keep it moving. Eventually we’ll get there. Day by day. I GOT THIS SHIT!!!
I think your Roomate is probably not as passive aggressive as you may think, I think your addiction is killing your confidence so much that you almost seek attack from other people when their speaking to you so you can get angry and all of this anger and uncomfortability comes from within, finding god isn’t enough, seek god seek therapy try to build upon the insecurities you developed as a child, decide to grow as an adult and as a person I’m 18 and I’ve struggled with this for years and you don’t want to be 30 with a wife and kids with this addiction imagine your future son thinking of his dad as a childish gooner, that’ll give you some motivation but don’t hate yourself just tell yourself you won’t turn out that way because you’re gonna make the changes now, there is no tomorrow you will make the change now and everyday onwards from here is a testament of your strength, I have been going through withdrawals of porn and masterbation simply touching myself and squeezing would calm me down I’ve been having panic attacks and heart palpitations from the stress and it’s all shit I’ve created in my head which means I can get rid of it by getting it out of my head by thinking speaking and acting the change into existence, you got this brother hope u read this and it helps