I realised how fucked up I am
Day 0
by Dragon Balls
131 upvotes
You might have gotten the hint from the subject. Yes, I have relapsed, again. And this time, it was some really dark stuff. Step fantasy dark. And I came to that stuff. The post nut clarity hit me shortly after that. But I wish it had hit me harder. I am literally the scum of this world. And I wanna gonna do something about it. Idk why I keep failing. It’s not the failing that has frustrated me. It’s how easily I fail. How the fuck can I fail so easily. It’s could be LV.1 challenge/urge and I would fall for it even if I were on 15th day. So fucking pissed at myself. I hate myself so much right now
Sorry to hear that bro, keep going, that’s all. Never rely on emotions or motivations purely. I wanna share a method that is working for me so try it out and see what results you can get : blank paper or page in whatever notes app you use, write down « Reasons why I succeeded » and « Reasons why I failed » and add bulletpoints to each. Throughout your days, add the reasons which are specific to you (ex for me : reinstalled dating apps, dark rooms), and after a few days, make a checklist of what you need to do to make sure you don’t relapse. It’s the only tool I found that gets better and provides value the more you use it. Works for other things as well like habits or studying. Good luck.