Not about denying yourself but controlling it. Thoughts?
In the days I've been in this app I have come to see people demonising and kind of guilt tripping others because they failed? I think it's a rather toxic thing to do and not helpful at all. I've been to therapy about it (after a waiting list of .. 3 years) and if something my therapist said that rang true is that this addiction and overcoming it is not about going absolutely cold-turkey for all your life and denying yourself pleasure, but rather being able to control when to have it, to act before doing the easy thing of escaping from your problems and feelings by pleasuring yourself and literally erasing your brain from it. My goal with this app is not to 'stop it forever', but to get the control back and knowing WHEN and admitting that although it is needed and there is nothing wrong with pleasure, too much of a good thing hurts, and doing it all days twice a day like I was doing is not healthy and it is destroying yourself. I want to learn to do it twice or once a week and being able to say "that was enough". There is nothing wrong with pleasure. For people doing it for religious purposes that is absolutely fair. But don't be a toxic person and just make a villain out of your body and shame yourself for relapsing. The fact that you had control is learning and I believe more people should think of it that way instead of thinking is a "never again" thing. In my opinion, you will be happier with yourself and healthier. Let me know what you think, I would love to hear about those who have gone cold for a longer period of time and stopped it all together forever.
For me as Christian, I can appreciate some of what you’re saying.. 1. No one should be shaming anyone. 2. We should not hate pleasure, nothing wrong with it (in its proper contexts) However, from a Christian perspective, there is no controlling lust. You think can control it because sin is deceitful. That’s the Bible tells believers to flee from youthful lusts, emphasis a on flee, stay away from, don’t go near, do not touch, avoid at all costs, because God knows how alluring lust is to us. My goal is to completely stop watching porn because it feeds my lust. It only makes me want it more. So I not only want to deny myself from it, but I am commanded to in scripture. Why? 1. Because it’s harmful. You may think a peek here and there is harmless, but it’s eating away at your soul. 2. Because God hates sin. God is good, and He only what’s good things for us, the most good thing in the universe is Himself. Lust goes against Gods goodness, therefore it is not good for us. Why can I say that? Because God made us, He created us, therefore He determines Howe should live, we were made to live for Him, but sin entered the picture and now all we want to to pleasure ourselves, not just sexually but in every aspect of life we seek our own pleasure and enjoyment. That’s the antithesis of how God wants us to live. I’d love to discuss further if you want, you can message me on telegram @southernairtemple