I’ve been feeling like crap lately.

Ik this is not related to porn, but I need to get this off my chest. I am an Arab who can’t speak Arabic. I hate every single second when I remind myself of this. I feel uncultured and lost in terms of my identity. I am trying to learn the language and this shit is challenging. I am not going to give up, but I really want to see some change soon. I feel lost, I hate telling people that I am Arab and then telling them I can’t speak this language, I feel so embarrassed. Any tips/ways to help me learn to speak this language will be so helpful. Any apps y’all recommend? I am starting from zero essentially. I hate every second of these thoughts, they just can’t leave.