I thought I failed

I flapped at my desk while as was working and thought I realapse. I still remember how deviated I was that I not only relapsed but I did it at the office around coworkers. I thought “What the heck just happened to me?” Then the next thing I know I woke up in my bed and let me tell you the pure relieve of realizing I had not flapped was so much better than if I did. Thank God I didn’t. Balls no longer hurt, urges are lessening and these dreams are getting more intense. I’m on day 5 now and plan on going all the way. That seven sec of pleasure is not worth it. Keep up the fighting the good fight. The Lord has a plan for you and it will be great!