Exhausted
I denied having this addiction for so long. I lied to my girlfriend, I never spoke about it for so so long. I finally admitted to my girlfriend of this addiction. She doesn’t want much to do with me anymore. But I feel relieved? I feel relieved that I told someone, I feel like I can focus on quitting now that I’m not denying it to myself, and others. I hope my girlfriend will see the other side of me. I hated lying and denying it to her and myself. I hate myself for that and for this awful addiction. God does not value this in the eyes of a man, and I hope I can break this for myself and do right by god.
She hugged me and said it’s okay, and was very kind because she knew how hard it was for me to say it. But also expressed how hard it would be to stay together, so she left. Appreciate all your responses. And support, you’re all amazing!