Nothing changes if nothing changes
I relapsed today, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t see it coming. I was on a 6 day streak but I knew my partner would be out the house today leaving me alone for the first time this week. This has always been when I’m at my weakest. Knowing that I would be alone I should have made a plan on how I would stay in control of my own thoughts, but instead I allowed myself to go down that path knowing where it would lead. It was as if I thought I wouldn’t be to blame, like it was some kind of naturally instinct. The fact is I saw it coming and should have worked hard to stop myself relapsing. Going forward I need to find a way to control my thoughts and break the pattern. The easiest solution is just to never be alone again but that just isn’t realistic, the better option is probably to spend the first half hour alone doing some meditation and stopping the thoughts before they get momentum. Everyone that posts on here saying stuff like “ I’ll never relapse again”, “this was the last time”, etc… please remember: Nothing changes if nothing changes
That’s a really good sign of building up willpower. The fact that you saw it coming, and wanted to avoid it. With time that willpower will grow, and you’ll actually be able to avoid that urge.