Death Grip Syndrome

Embarrassing to admit but here we are. I’m an addict. Not specifically just to porn, but in the way I consume it. I’ve been masturbating the same way, the same methods but the content gets more ‘hardcore’ or perhaps niche, the longer this goes on. I’ve conditioned myself to such a specific method and with the more unique the material, in any sexual encounters, I struggle with erections and when I do, I simply cannot finish, no matter how attractive she is or how much I want to. It just doesn’t feel like ‘it should’ I guess? It’s not an attraction thing, because pre sex, all I want to do is tear her clothes off. But the moment comes, I know about my inabilities due to this so called “death grip syndrome” of creating such a tailored way of masturbating that I just can’t perform. In the oddest way, I’ve become so reliant on myself that nothing else compares? This leads to just feeling incredibly inadequate and falling down the rabbit hole of the same behaviour that got me here, pornography and those same specific methods that’s left me so desensitised mentally and physically in the bedroom. It’s just a vicious circle so here we are, an app and a different method I guess. Can’t get any worse. Day 1.