I hate this time

Just hit a week, and every time I relapse around here. I’m determined to stop it. Today, I was hit HARD by some temptations to “peek,” ended up redownloading instagram (where all of my shit is) and acted like I was gonna peek, but never did. I still was kind of on a dopamine/anticipation high from seeing the familiar front page of instagram, usually only seen right before a session. I resisted and deleted instagram, but it’s gonna be a good few weeks until I get into a routine of running from urges rather than kinda entertaining them, then saying no with willpower (which I do want to get away from using since it’s easy to fail and feel shitty afterward using this method) I’m staying strong and reporting progress as it comes in my posts. It seems to help.