Got to confess something

I relapsed tonight after being on a 2 week streak. I would be mad at myself but I’m kind of just numb right now and feel incredibly depressed. I wish lust never existed. I wish porn wasn’t legal. I thought that last time would be the last but it wasn’t. I don’t have anybody that’s willing to help my addiction and I don’t have much money for a “program” I forget the reason I’m even trying to quit a lot of the time because I don’t feel like my life is gonna get better even without the porn. I take walks etc but it never gets rid of the emptiness inside. I feel like the male loneliness epidemic is making this addiction ten times worse. Porn really is a complete work of Satan and evil in carnate. The only way I think I could achieve freedom is if I was forced into a building that has very limited access to technology and can’t leave it for a month unless in a group or all my technology access was disabled for a month and yes I mean to those extremes. You could say what about filters but let’s be real when the next urge comes up you’re just gonna turn it off because you likely know how to. How did we get here? I got addicted at 10 years old and I know that’s not an uncommon experience. Did you learn the consequences only years after getting addicted at that age when you were finally old enough to really grasp what you were doing and how these videos were made? Did we ever picture where this addiction would take us at that age. I wish I was born in a pre porn generation. Society needs to do something about porn. There has to be repercussions for whoever makes these demonic websites. Who in their right mind sleeps well at night knowing they pimped out a girl on drugs etc or has been likely sexually abused and isn’t in their right mind or if they made it to where a father couldn’t be able to take care of their own kids correctly and be proper husbands and being the cause of thousands of divorces and millions of depressed men because they’ve had an addiction to porn at an age they had no idea of the true consequences. Who decided it was okay for something that has a higher dopamine high than heroine and meth combined should ever be made legal and easily accessible knowing millions of kids would be addicted. Like yeah parents should take more responsibility to prevent that but the fact you know not all parents will do that and do it anyways at the child’s harm is despicable. Nobody should have to feel this way.