Reason Number 6 of Why I Want to Quit Porn. I realize how it’s numbed my emotions.

Something I noticed today is that I feel emotions a little more. More positive emotions I guess. Less depression and anxiety, my mind is able to relax a little more, I see other peoples emotions and recognize their emotions more. An unexpected side effect I suppose. Not that it’s bad, just interesting. I noticed at the gym that I could see emotions in women that I suppose I never noticed before. I noticed their body language more, their mannerisms, their expression. If they were more closed off, more receptive, etc. Just something I never thought I would notice. Something else I noticed is I desire companionship way more than before. Like I wouldn’t talk to women just because I was ashamed and felt guilty. I guess another possibility is that I was fulfilling my sexual desire via porn and know in order to get that I have to talk to a female. Not that I just want to have sex, more so I desire that relationship with someone. That closeness with another person, the intimacy of conversation, holding hands, or when you walk into a restaurant and your hand is on her back to just sort of let her know your there; and other little things that I have never really cared about before. It definitely shows my mind is healing and I’m very grateful to God for the progress I have made. I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and just magically be on the other side of this, but day by day choosing to stay away from this addiction and to choose God; I will eventually be on the other side of this. It’s a day by day battle, but you have to go through it. You either keep going or turn back. And I’m choosing to keep going.