Porn makes me hate myself

When I first downloaded this app I went 15 days and can honestly say those were maybe the best 15 days of my adult life. I was happy, I was confident, I was motivated to be better and to do better. But the past couple weeks has been brutal, and I can’t get a grip on this addiction anymore. I know I am getting tempted by the enemy, because these urges and the way the urges come in and the timing is so hard to resist. I want freedom because the shame and guilt is so fucking heavy. It gets hard to breath sometimes, and I just want peace from God from this addiction. It’s tearing me apart, and I don’t want it anymore. I will resist and take every thought captive. Because this is going to kill me if it already hasn’t. I am going to get over this addiction. Lord my God I’m on knees begging for your help. I need your support to protect my mind. I need you help to heal, to mend what has been broken over 8 years. God I have looked lustfully at women for 8 years, I have thought ill thoughts towards your daughters, I have used them as a source of entertainment and addiction for 8 years and I pray you forgive me of that, and I pray I turn from that. I pray you mend my broken heart, I pray you mend my broken mind. I pray you put me back together. I come to you as a willing servant. As a prodigal son. I have ate with the pigs, I have reached my lowest, father God take me back and make me a new person. Make me whole again