Just started

I first watched porn when I was around 6 or 7, being watching almost every day since then. Today was my breaking point, a couple months ago my ex partner broke up with me, initially I thought it was because she just needed space since she was mentally ill (like me) but then today I realised she broke up with me because I treated her like shit, kept on asking her for nudes, omg and when she just wanted to sleep i would come over and touch her even after she said she didn't want to. I just felt so fucking disgusted about myself, I honestly feel like I don't deserve to live. I became my worst nightmare. I just wanna try this app for a few weeks, I know I'll never fully recover, but I just wanna do anything to stop this. It's destroying me, it destroyed the one person that I loved the most. I'm glad that she's found someone better than me, I just hope I can be better for someone else