4 Days - First Post

The tension headaches have been the hardest to deal with. Normally I’d use this as an excuse to relapse because I’ll feel better physically, but I’d rather feel like shit than to allow my mental health to keep suffering from my 15-year addiction. The urges really started to creep up on me last night, which is probably why I had my first sexual dream since I’ve gone clean 96 hours ago. It was about this blonde bombshell with insane 🍒 that wanted to hook up back in 2020, but I didn’t. I’ve regretted it ever since. Today, I went grocery shopping this morning and saw a relatively attractive mature woman with an 🍑 out of this world. I’d 100% relapse in the past based on the dream and seeing that woman. Not today, or tomorrow, or the day after that. I’ll continue to have “wet” dreams and see attractive women of all varieties in public. But I WILL NOT go back to feeling like a loser.