I broke up with my gf about a month or so ago for another girl. Me and that girl kind of faded out and I told her I couldn’t do it. Felt like I loved my gf still and wanted her back. I thought I was running away from my gf due to how serious it was getting and because of shame about the way I was living, porn being a big part of that. Well I shifted my worldview completely. I don’t have any urges to watch porn and I am focused on being better all around. But now that I’m back with her I feel like I might have made a mistake. I was having sex with her and I started thinking about the girl I was dating while we were broken up. It’s like I was indifferent about sex completely. And now she’s giving me grief about going out with another girl and asking me if she really is the one I want but it’s like the more she gives me grief and asks me things like that the less I know. Maybe the thrill of a new girl and new things is all the other girl was bc I felt the exact same way about my gf when we first got together. I dont know what it’s supposed to feel like when you’re with somebody long term or how to get it back to the way I felt before. It’s just a tough spot because I know she loves me and now I’m finally where I need to be for her but I don’t know if I want to be. When we were broke up she’s all I wanted but now that I’m back I don’t know if I should have.
Comments (2)
Derrick•133d ago
It sounds like you may need some time to yourself and figure out what it is you really desire. You may need to talk to a professional to help you navigate how you feel.
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1. get a therapist 2. Journal about your emotions 3. Dont get down on yourself. But don’t “bleed” on your girlfriend to soothe your own emotions. 4. Shame is something that you can overcome. Once you come to terms with yourself, you won’t feel shame about yourself or actions. But the big piece here is to determine why you run from your emotions, and soothe with porn/another girl. Trust me. It’s worth diving into understand your emotions with a professional. At the end of the day, you have to make sure you’re good with yourself before you can be good with another person (your girlfriend). You can do both at the same time (it’s harder), but you definitely have to make sure you’re good.