The lizard in my mind is like oh you’re horny? Go jerk off. Dude it’s a pain in the ass because I feel like I’m not in control once I’m done. I keep telling my self not to do it but I do it anyways. How do I find self control in this?
I would guess that there are 2 ways to change your view on it. You can judge the act itself or you can judge yourself. The act you could begin to see as disgusting, childish, etc. You could see who you are when you do JO as a perv, gollum-type creep, etc. I don’t think either of these are truly the best solution tho. You should want to reward yourself for being strong. Not lash yourself for your failure. I was tempted once to pinch myself when I got the urge to associate the feeling with something negative but I’m not sure that is the right way.
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I call that autopilot. It’s like there’s a point where I make the decision without even realizing it and just end up going through the motions even as I’m actively thinking in my head how much I hate it. I don’t think your problem is that you don’t hate your addiction, if you didn’t hate it at least a little bit, you wouldn’t be here. I think you need to learn to love what’s good. Love what it feels like to walk in purity. Love what it feels like to be a self-controlled man. Love what it feels like to be a man of integrity and honor. Love what it feels like to be someone others can look up to. If you begin to love righteousness, hating evil becomes easy. I don’t know if you’re a man of faith, but Psalms 97:10 says, “You who love the Lord, hate evil! He preserves the souls of His saints; He delivers them out of the hands of the wicked.” For me, the more I find that the more I seek the Lord, the easier it becomes to love what he loves and hates what he hates. You can do this. 💪🏼