I am so lost

Urges will come back. Always. But with more and more time away it gets easier. I’m at 21 days and I still have urges. But setting goals, having a higher power ( god for me) which whatever you believe, and truly understanding your triggers will help.

I don’t know if you’re religious but think about how god would feel, the devil gives you ways to happiness like little shortcuts, which is called masturbating. But with god, he gives you the happiness rather than those little shortcuts that the devil gives you.