By no means am I there but…

But for the first time in a long time I could cuddle with my wife and get a natural erection AND not feel like I need to be in a rush to get things going. I felt clear minded and in control. I think porn also trains you to be mission oriented, to a point where you almost don’t have control. When I was watching and jerking off and then trying to have sex with my wife, I always felt a little like a race car stuck in traffic trying to get ahead. But this time, there was no rush. I was in the moment feeling and being. I also had the thoughts of losing my erection just wash over my mind instead of sticking and threatening.