My Comment on a Post About Whether Sex Is a Relapse
It depends on your reason for quitting. If your goal is based on religious or moral values, like many people here, then yes, having sex might be considered a relapse. But if you’re doing NoFap for self-improvement and recovery from porn addiction, it’s different. Personally, I don’t see sex with a real partner as a relapse, unless it triggers the same negative patterns. If you performed well and the experience was healthy and consistent, that’s progress. You’re rewiring your brain to respond to real intimacy instead of artificial stimulation. But if you struggled - like with delayed ejaculation or porn-induced ED - it could create stress or frustration that pulls you back into porn. That’s why I’m holding off on sex, not because I think sex is bad, but because I want to be symptom-free first, just to be sure. What I do consider a relapse is video sex, exchanging nudes, or fapping to her pictures and vids. That’s still screen-based arousal, which reinforces the same porn pathways we’re trying to break.
this is a fair evaluation. i abstained from porn and fap and my sex drive is off the charts, and my sexual confidence is actually present. i told myself a relapse is me jerking off or me watching porn. i quit so i can get a partner to be intimate with.